Love may come from the heart, but romance is a state of mind. And let’s face it – not all of us are born with a natural inclination to be romantic. Some of us simply have a hard time expressing our feelings, and even more difficulty showing the women in our lives that we care about them. Nonetheless, it’s important to cultivate our romantic inclinations; after all, it’s the currency that most women use to evaluate our feelings for them. A gesture or a gift can express what our words cannot, and can communicate both our thoughtfulness and our caring.
The first step in tapping into our romantic nature is to look at things from the woman’s perspective. Notice that the ways in which you view the world – and your relationship – are different than the ways she views things. Next, make it a point to notice the small things that catch her attention. Perhaps she comments on how delicious a certain wine is, how beautiful the neighbor’s yard looks with a particular flower in bloom, or how she saw a gorgeous piece of jewelry at the mall.
Once you begin to pay attention to what brings her pleasure and happiness, you’re on your way to being a true romantic. The thing to keep in mind is that romance is about her desires, not yours. Your satisfaction comes from watching her joy.
The next step in cultivating your romantic nature is showing your affection through your deeds. Believe it or not, the most mundane things – like noticing the clean dishes need to be put away and doing it without being asked – can mean a tremendous amount to a woman. Plucking a flower from your garden and presenting her with it when you come home from work can bring tears of appreciation to her eyes. And, when the occasions arise, selecting meaningful gifts will, from her perspective, affirm your feelings for her.
The primary rule of romantic gift giving is selecting something that she will enjoy. That may sound simplistic, but more than man has been bewildered at why his wife or girlfriend wasn’t thrilled with the Xbox, PlayStation, or Nintendo he had given her. After all, he considered it the perfect gift, and would have been grateful to receive a gaming system.
Instead, select a gift that conveys that you understand her sense of style and taste, and that you appreciate her as a woman. Perfume, tasteful lingerie, and jewelry are always appropriate. She might be delighted with personal electronics, as long as you add a personal touch. If you give her an iPod or mp3 player, for example, download songs from her favorite artists.
When you’re cultivating your romantic nature, the most important thing to remember is that you don’t have to be perfect. Gestures and gifts that communicate your thoughtfulness and appreciation of her as a person and as a woman are certain to delight her.